I read about Ragnarok at 2AM
Dec. 22nd, 2010 12:32 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
breezeshadowI was in a bar. It was a dingy sort of place, dark and wooden, with a few steps leading to a private area, blocked off from the rest of the bar. It was quiet, and we were the only people there, sitting in the private area. I do not recall who my companions were; they may have been family. I felt like I had been there before, and perhaps I had been. The waitress was the most cheerful part of the whole scene; she may have worn pink. Pink was pretty important in this dream, which is hilarious, because I hate that colour.
Then I was given advice by some woman. The world was going to end, and I was going to start it. What I needed to do was get to this cabinet and shatter this artifact. It was glowing pink, and once it was broken, the whole process would begin. Then, after a bit, the world would be reborn and all would be well or something, though who knows what was wrong in the first place. I was with a few other people, but I am not sure who -- Neil may have been one of them, but I really don't know.
So somehow I ended up on the roof of the bar. The entire atmosphere was extremely dark, with some orange undertones, like the sky was on fire. There was a metal cabinet on the roof. I think Neil was standing near it. I remember noise from a fight, and the creaking of metal. I opened the cabinet and found TWO pink glowing objects. Crap, I thought. I started with the thin metallic one, about the size and thickness of a laptop motherboard. Using my mind, I caused it to shake violently, but I could not get it to break. So I moved to the other one, which looked like a lump of rock with a glowing pink core. This moved much more easily, and I rocked it off of its ledge, and it broke on the ground.
The pink core was split and its glow faded, leaving something clear and silver, like a pearl. I was afraid to stomp on the pieces, so I broke a few more with my mind, though it was difficult. Then I got nervous. Shouldn't the world had reacted by now? What if this was the wrong piece to break?
I turned to the woman who had been advising me -- and I remember her looks now, long black hair, nondescript black dress -- and asked her about it. She confirmed that yes, I had broken the wrong one. Panicked, I asked her if I should go back in time and break the other one instead. She told me that no, that wouldn't be necessary... And indeed, everything swung into motion.
Basically everything started falling apart. I remember the buildings falling, except the one we stood on. I thought, with relief, that the world must have realized we wanted it to end, and thus went through with it. Smoke was spewing from the sky. The sounds of the fight had gone away; now I just heard the sounds of everything slowly collapsing.
Then John appeared. I had been warned he would. He was in a trance of some sorts, floating over to the building from no where. His eyes were glazed, and he was sort of discorporeal. I walked over and he dropped a ring of keys into my hand, and said something, I don't know what. His voice was distant, and I was heart-broken. I wanted to hug him, get him to stay, do SOMETHING, but I knew that he would float away and I would never see him again. He had served his purpose in the world's end and was going to die, pretty much. I was crushed watching him float away into the smoke.
Of course then flames started spewing everywhere and that was pretty distracting. And I guess I woke up then, because I can't remember anything else after that.
I woke up feeling a lot less depressed than I have over the past few days. THEN I remembered the scene with John and was like "WHOA brain, what the HELL are you doing?" Poor John. It's not often that my FRIENDS die in my dreams. I'm going to assume he was reborn with the rest of the world.
This is what happens when you read about Ragnarok late at night.
The depression has gotten pretty bad -- I was up so late reading Wikipedia to try and make myself too tired to think (it basically worked -- I was thinking, of course, but not about anything especially depressing). For some reason I decided to also read AIM archives and figured out the depression started to linger in around mid-October -- which I already knew, but hey.
And it's frustrating, because I found out yesterday that my GPA has managed to jump up to 2.725 -- basically the minimum requirement for me to get into Cornell's grad program. So I actually have a chance of getting in. And yet even that couldn't shake the depression off. It has dug its claws in quite deep. Bah.
But after this dream I felt a little better. I'm not sure why, but I feel like the fact that things went well and as planned even after I "screwed up" has some symbolism to it. Almost like some part of my brain trying to tell me "Hey, it'll all be okay." And then it goes and has John possibly die because let's face it, my brain can't be sane and reasonable for more than five minutes. *chuckle* But yeah. Now I feel a little "bleh" but that's probably because a friend DIED IN ONE OF MY DREAMS. Thanks brain that's such a helpful way to make me feel better! *shakes head*
So I'm hoping today will be a better day, though I'm not that hungry right now, which is problematic, because I definitely should be. Stupid stomach. Time to force some food into it anyway. And some tea, because tea is awesome.
Tschuess.
Then I was given advice by some woman. The world was going to end, and I was going to start it. What I needed to do was get to this cabinet and shatter this artifact. It was glowing pink, and once it was broken, the whole process would begin. Then, after a bit, the world would be reborn and all would be well or something, though who knows what was wrong in the first place. I was with a few other people, but I am not sure who -- Neil may have been one of them, but I really don't know.
So somehow I ended up on the roof of the bar. The entire atmosphere was extremely dark, with some orange undertones, like the sky was on fire. There was a metal cabinet on the roof. I think Neil was standing near it. I remember noise from a fight, and the creaking of metal. I opened the cabinet and found TWO pink glowing objects. Crap, I thought. I started with the thin metallic one, about the size and thickness of a laptop motherboard. Using my mind, I caused it to shake violently, but I could not get it to break. So I moved to the other one, which looked like a lump of rock with a glowing pink core. This moved much more easily, and I rocked it off of its ledge, and it broke on the ground.
The pink core was split and its glow faded, leaving something clear and silver, like a pearl. I was afraid to stomp on the pieces, so I broke a few more with my mind, though it was difficult. Then I got nervous. Shouldn't the world had reacted by now? What if this was the wrong piece to break?
I turned to the woman who had been advising me -- and I remember her looks now, long black hair, nondescript black dress -- and asked her about it. She confirmed that yes, I had broken the wrong one. Panicked, I asked her if I should go back in time and break the other one instead. She told me that no, that wouldn't be necessary... And indeed, everything swung into motion.
Basically everything started falling apart. I remember the buildings falling, except the one we stood on. I thought, with relief, that the world must have realized we wanted it to end, and thus went through with it. Smoke was spewing from the sky. The sounds of the fight had gone away; now I just heard the sounds of everything slowly collapsing.
Then John appeared. I had been warned he would. He was in a trance of some sorts, floating over to the building from no where. His eyes were glazed, and he was sort of discorporeal. I walked over and he dropped a ring of keys into my hand, and said something, I don't know what. His voice was distant, and I was heart-broken. I wanted to hug him, get him to stay, do SOMETHING, but I knew that he would float away and I would never see him again. He had served his purpose in the world's end and was going to die, pretty much. I was crushed watching him float away into the smoke.
Of course then flames started spewing everywhere and that was pretty distracting. And I guess I woke up then, because I can't remember anything else after that.
I woke up feeling a lot less depressed than I have over the past few days. THEN I remembered the scene with John and was like "WHOA brain, what the HELL are you doing?" Poor John. It's not often that my FRIENDS die in my dreams. I'm going to assume he was reborn with the rest of the world.
This is what happens when you read about Ragnarok late at night.
The depression has gotten pretty bad -- I was up so late reading Wikipedia to try and make myself too tired to think (it basically worked -- I was thinking, of course, but not about anything especially depressing). For some reason I decided to also read AIM archives and figured out the depression started to linger in around mid-October -- which I already knew, but hey.
And it's frustrating, because I found out yesterday that my GPA has managed to jump up to 2.725 -- basically the minimum requirement for me to get into Cornell's grad program. So I actually have a chance of getting in. And yet even that couldn't shake the depression off. It has dug its claws in quite deep. Bah.
But after this dream I felt a little better. I'm not sure why, but I feel like the fact that things went well and as planned even after I "screwed up" has some symbolism to it. Almost like some part of my brain trying to tell me "Hey, it'll all be okay." And then it goes and has John possibly die because let's face it, my brain can't be sane and reasonable for more than five minutes. *chuckle* But yeah. Now I feel a little "bleh" but that's probably because a friend DIED IN ONE OF MY DREAMS. Thanks brain that's such a helpful way to make me feel better! *shakes head*
So I'm hoping today will be a better day, though I'm not that hungry right now, which is problematic, because I definitely should be. Stupid stomach. Time to force some food into it anyway. And some tea, because tea is awesome.
Tschuess.
no subject
Date: 2010-12-23 01:41 am (UTC)Also, that is one impressive dream. I wish mine were ever that meaningful.