Could I stop breaking now?
Sep. 22nd, 2011 08:22 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
breezeshadowI can't look on DW lately without feeling horribly depressed, left out, and I guess "expired" would be the best word -- or maybe "outdated"? Basically no longer useful, dump her in the trash.
Which is REALLY fucking annoying seeing as feeling this way makes me not want to post, when posting would probably fix the damn problem. Instead I think "No I won't bother it's not worth it no one wants to hear from me" when logically I know that's a giant lie.
Why does my brain have to be so contrary?
In other news: joint pain still around, now accompanied by back pain, neck pain, and starting last night, chest pain. Will tell psychiatrist about it so she can set up an appointment because this is getting bad.
Woke up with nasty stomach pain on the day of an exam, not sure what it is, hope it's not an illness and just a fluke. Won't be eating breakfast right away, may get a snack on the run to nanobiotech.
I also can't shake off this feeling of being really thirsty.
Mentally the malaise is a bit better but the anxiety was nasty yesterday, and both it and the depression have been easily triggered. Like I said, I can't even go on DW without something triggering it. CLEARLY Celexa is doing a great job.
Also, the boyfriend is back in the states today which means we can text each other again! We're both pretty happy about that.
Also Principles of Drug Delivery is really interesting. Like, "I don't mind studying for this" kind of interesting. I find this exciting.
But I'm going to be late for class.
Tschuess.
Which is REALLY fucking annoying seeing as feeling this way makes me not want to post, when posting would probably fix the damn problem. Instead I think "No I won't bother it's not worth it no one wants to hear from me" when logically I know that's a giant lie.
Why does my brain have to be so contrary?
In other news: joint pain still around, now accompanied by back pain, neck pain, and starting last night, chest pain. Will tell psychiatrist about it so she can set up an appointment because this is getting bad.
Woke up with nasty stomach pain on the day of an exam, not sure what it is, hope it's not an illness and just a fluke. Won't be eating breakfast right away, may get a snack on the run to nanobiotech.
I also can't shake off this feeling of being really thirsty.
Mentally the malaise is a bit better but the anxiety was nasty yesterday, and both it and the depression have been easily triggered. Like I said, I can't even go on DW without something triggering it. CLEARLY Celexa is doing a great job.
Also, the boyfriend is back in the states today which means we can text each other again! We're both pretty happy about that.
Also Principles of Drug Delivery is really interesting. Like, "I don't mind studying for this" kind of interesting. I find this exciting.
But I'm going to be late for class.
Tschuess.
